Young Chronic

I know, I know. I've been away for a while. But now I'm coming back home to you. And no, I will not come back empty handed. I respect a lot. For you are what makes me, me.

Thank you for being loyal, brave, true, and patient with me. I've been going through the toughest time of my life. And you can bet there's much to share with you as a result. I love you. And I'll be seeing you soon.

Regards

On January 12, 2021, I lost my mother to COVID-19. The one person that supported me since I wrote my first song at 9 years old. I failed to make it in music faster before I could fulfill one of my biggest wishes, and that's buying her a house up in the hills somewhere. It's too late now. And I feel like a complete failure. I had every chance to say "Thank You", but I didn't. I was waiting for a dream I have to blossom.

Pain tends to bring out the best in me. And I like to think that's why you love me so much. And I appreciate that. The day you subscribed to me it became my life's mission to keep you engaged, entertained, interested, and devoted to me. I Am YC is no traditional EP. It's also not a direct dedication to my recently late mother. Even though track 1 (I Don't Belong With Anyone) is inspired by the misfortune of losing her.

There are minute elements of anger in there. Together with love, frustration, stress and depression. All artistically crafted together into lyrics to transfer the feeling I had when writing it to you after you listen to it a couple of times. Especially the second verses of track one and two.

I'd like to take this time to thank you. To let you know how much I have for you. And how bad I wish to meet you. But we're in the age of Google Meet, Zoom, Facetime etc, which makes it very possible to meet with you before the concert dates in the future.

Stay tight. Keep loving me. Keep supporting me. My dear friend. Thank You! ????????????

Have you ever had someone in your life that just made you feel like you’ve found the last puzzle piece that completes the entire picture of your life? Yes? Not yet? Thought so?

Yeah well, here’s my story...

Some time in early 2016, I was walking with a friend a few blocks away from my house, answering boring questions about my music blah, blah, blah…

I remember it like it was yesterday. I had on my black high-top All Star Converse sneakers, black Puma track pants and a white long sleeved New York T-shirt and black sun glasses. In South Africa we have a vast public transport system. The cheapest ones being the most crowded, especially in the townships and the ghetto. My neighborhood is quiet, really. By the time we got to the intersection, there’s a huge boulder with graffiti next to the bus stop. My shoe laces were loose and I bent over and tied them. A bus stops right next to me. When I got back up, my friend points to the window, I turn to look and there’s this girl, staring at me in the face. She didn’t even blink. We locked eyes until the bus disappeared as it drove away.

In that moment, everything else disappeared. It was like a dream sequence in slow motion. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. So I went back home. The following day I woke up with a feeling of emptiness. It was… I can’t describe it. So, I soon forgot about her. Life goes on. Six months later, my bwoi Daniel came to see me on campus. He needed to use the lavatory so on our way past the cafeteria, there she was. Standing at about 5’8”, and slightly slim. A brunette with long shiny hair, a round face, and big, perfectly shaped eyes. The very same girl I saw in that bus six months ago.

To my surprise, she recognized me. Once again, we locked eyes. Stared at each other consistently for about fifteen to twenty seconds. My friend was like, word for word, he said, “Oh hell no bruh. What would a girl like that want with you? You’re a rapper, and you’re broke. Forget it baby! Dream on.”

She then broke eye contact, dropped her arms to her sides, and started walking towards me. When I heard her voice for the first time, I almost crumbled and hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. Thank goodness I’m an experienced actor. I was able to appear calm, relaxed, and unbothered. Though my heart was racing for the hills. Hers too. I could tell by the frequent gasps and deep breaths she took...

*The rest of the story is in the lyrics...

If you’re wired like me, you’d know the only thing that drives us is simply passion. I have one of the same magnitude if not more as faith. Like I always tell many musicians of an aspiring nature one thing: “If you want to be a tiger, you must behave like a tiger. When you behave like a tiger, people will treat you like a tiger. When people start treating you like a tiger, that makes you a tiger.”

2019 has been the most important year of my life. Everything I’ve experienced this year, sharpened my sight, loosened my joints, and strengthened my grip. I’ve lost relatives. I’ve finally gotten to see who, the people I have thought of as my best friends truly were. My sanity and health were tested. I have accumulated very specific and instructional memories.

Out of all things I have been through this year, one lesson shines through: I have got to have faith in myself. I have got to believe that things will work out. I’m not going to lie to you, it’s tough to admit but, I’m struggling. As a small kid I have always envisioned myself in my early twenties as a well established artist. But I am truly happy, that I have found what makes me, me. And I am fortunate enough to have people like you in my corner, to love, to cheer, to cherish, respect, and believe in me and my talents.

All I ever wanted was to make real, organic content conceived through the lens of my eyes, every beat of my heart, and the sound of my voice. As I am sitting under this tree writing this with a healthy smile on my face, I humbly ask you to never let anyone tell you, you can’t do anything. That’s what it means to quiet the surrounding noise. No matter how bleak it may be, you must: Have A Little Faith In You.

We, humans are the most dangerous living beings on this planet. You might think wild animals are, I don’t blame you, but they aren’t. They are just as terrified of you as you are of them. Yes, Humans are killed by wild animals every year. But trust me, animals wouldn’t feel the need to kill you if they didn’t perceive you as threat. Now, what makes us more dangerous? Animals are predictable. Humans aren’t.

Evolution has chosen brain over brawn. That means; the smarter we get, the weaker (physically) we get. Humans have the ability to destroy all forms of life in a single day. Not only do we pose a threat to wild habitat, but to our planet. Therefore, our very existence.

Greed is what destroys the quality of natural life. People have become more on profit than general well-being and longevity. There was a gorilla in the USA that learned basic sign language named Koko. Koko’s last words on tape were: “I love man. But man stupid. Protect Earth. Protect Earth.” A horripilation of dread consumed my entire body!

We mustn’t wait on people in power or position of authority to take action for they have a broader reach and a lot of abundant resources. Make your small contribution. Planting a tree is a good start. Learn to spend money on experiences and not on material things. Develop a habit of gratitude. Learn to share. Tread everyone kindly. And most importantly, SMILE MORE.

What do you want? I mean, deep down. What is it you really want? That one realistic thing you desire above all else? That is a deep question. Can you answer it? Most people can’t. Some feel like they’re being pushed into a corner. Like their privacy is invaded. Their brain perceives this question as an attack that triggers retaliation. Making “nothing that concerns you” an ideal response.

I want to be the most sought after music artist and on-screen performer of the future. I want to be the most loved musician in recent years. A dream of which I am way too far from accomplishing it. And that’s okay. It’s hard. Not everyone will love my music. But I believe it will happen one day. Not by luck, magic, or some miracle. I don’t believe in that stuff. I’m a simple guy. I’m YC. I don’t hate anyone, I hold no grudges, I forgive, and, I like to lend a helping hand. That’s how I was raised.

I have always kept myself to myself. I don’t like taking or posing for pictures, social media, smartphones, trends, fashion, non of that. Some even THINK I don’t like other people. I didn’t choose to be introverted. I accepted who I am as a person. I’m that guy. I prefer talking to people in person without initiating. I always reply to the messages you send to me, and answer all your questions as honest as possible. Waking up to a message someone left for me that shows genuine admiration for my music is THE BEST THING EVER!!!

I don’t just want you to be my fan. That’s shallow. I want you to be my friend. I want to feel that close to you. I’m barely making a living from my music. And that’s okay. Things will get better. I’m not gonna front or act like I’m living a bomb-ass life that most musicians have, and there’s no shame in that. That’s not what drives me. That’s not my goal. What I really yearn for; is to stay in touch with everyone who’s been with me since the first day I arrived here on N1M. You. Yes, YOU! My best friend!

For every song I write. Every melody. Every piano key I push. Every idea. Every opportunity. Every message. Every song you play. Every recommendation. Every time you utter my name to someone who’s never heard of me before. When you subscribed, you agreed to a lifetime of friendship I initiated through my music. I want each and every song of mine you play, to bring us close in the distance. Like I’m right there, in the moment with you. That’s what drives me. That is what I want. What about you?

Emotion is a potent force that drives humanity. It’s beautiful, assertive, and can be destructive at times, to a point where it’s almost impossible to control. Most people find themselves in trouble because of this. Some find themselves having said stuff they can’t take back. I’ve been there.

I’ve also realized that it’s easier to surrender to emotion than it is to oppose it. It feels like the harder you fight it, the stronger it grows. But people are different. We look different, we feel different, we come from different backgrounds, we want to go to different places, we have different aspirations, mental capacities, different motivations, the list is long.

The keyword here is, ‘different’. The word is bigger than we think. It denotes variety and comparison. But when it comes to emotions; differences don’t lie within the emotion itself. They stem from how we react to them, our actions therefore, and how we handle the consequences of those actions.

I feel like everything has a negative side, and a positive side. Not everything bad is bad. Not everything good is good. There’s something good/positive about every tragedy. This is what some people refer to as, “The Silver Lining.” In my book (opinion), love is the most destructive emotion. It is one I, personally, can’t handle. When I love, I go all in. I fall hard. When you break my heart you literally destroy me. This is what led love to be the center of my artistic expression. I made myself believe that I use my heart and not my brain to make art (music).

I know what you’re thinking. People? Differences, emotions, positive and negative, the silver lining? How does all this come together? I’ll tell you…

I’ve got my fair share of heartbreaks. Painful. Almost went insane. But the music protected me. Being an artist saved my life. Like I said in one of my songs, “If I didn’t have passion for music I wouldn’t be mentally fit.” But I focused on the silver lining of all the bad that’s happened to me. Heartbreaks. It was sent as a blessing or a lesson. I still believe in love. True love. It exists. I believe there’s a special girl somewhere in the world out there waiting for me. Through this next song, this is what I have to say to her...

At Star Town Music in Johannesburg, where I record my music, there’s a guy there named Roger, a producer, turned friend. Almost three years ago, I made a demo titled Lonely Soul and was with Roger when I wrote and recorded it. Roger contracted a contagious skin infection so we had to put everything on hold. I’m one artist who constantly writes new songs I quickly forgot about Lonely Soul and moved on to create new content.

Three months ago, I went to record Do You Blame Me? At STM but Roger wasn’t in. I stopped by Roger’s house the following day. He invited me in and introduced me to his mother, Evelyn. He was like; “Ma! Here’s YC. The guy who wrote Lonely Soul. YC, my mom right there.” And I was like; “Mrs. Seyfried, nice to meet…” and she cut in and said, “Evelyn. Please.”

It turns out Evelyn fell in love with my demo and has been playing it over the years. “And exactly when do I get to see you performing Lonely Soul?” she asked, I told her it was just a stupid demo I made many months ago and didn’t proceed to create a professional version.

Evelyn works for Clientele insurance, but always wanted to be a social worker growing up. The day she first heard Lonely Soul was a partly cloudy Saturday morning when Roger went out to get some bread leaving his phone on the table with music playing. When she tried to turn the music off it asked for a password, therefore had no choice but to wait for Roger to come back. That was when she first heard Lonely Soul.

She said, after listening to it a couple of times, it rejuvenated her desires as a youth, causing her to remember what she’d always wanted growing up, and that it changed her life in just mere minutes. She’s now enrolled at The University of Johannesburg, studying to become a social worker. She’s 48 years old.

She urged me to release this song, claiming it to have changed her life and that it might have the same effect on someone else. With both my hands, I wiped the tears of joy off my face and went, “Alright. What the hell? Thank you.” But I don’t know. I’m leaving it to you to decide. Please do let me know what you think.

See you next week. Enjoy!